Coping - what you need to know

“Whatever is flexible and flowing will tend to grow whatever is rigid and blocked will wither and die”
                                                                                                                                  -Tao te ching

1. We have no control over some of our life events. They are probably going to happen whether we like it or not.

2. Coping is made up of the responses (thoughts, feelings and actions) that an individual uses to deal with problematic situations that are encountered in everyday life and in particular circumstances.

3. Coping has two major functions; dealing with the problem that is causing the distress and regulating our own emotion.

4. Coping may not be capable of terminating the stress, but often mange it which includes tolerating or accepting the stress and distress.

5. Personality, situational demand and socio cultural factors can influence your coping strategies.

6. No single method is effective; a combination of approaches is generally most effective.

7. What works for one person does not necessarily work for someone else.

8. Problems may arises from collective sources thus effective coping require collective action.

9. Many of our response to stress is involuntary for example intrusive thoughts. Many of our responses are an automatic for example withdrawal from others.

10. Daily hassles were more important factor in negative health outcomes than major life events.

11. Many people believe that certain emotional responses to stress such as anger are innate and unchangeable, but the fact is we can change our emotional reactions.

12. Coping process are conscious, intentional, learned and associated with normal adjustment.

13. There may be no universally good or bad coping processes though some might be better or worse than others.

14. Coping choice may be less important than how well you execute that choice.

15. Coping strategies may have multiple functions and their meaning and efficacy may change according to circumstances.

16. Coping is related to physical and mental health.

17. Coping strategies may not directly affect physiology but indirectly affect health related behaviour.

18. Coping effectiveness depends on the individuals, their problem and with their emotions.

19. Many chronic stressors are not readily noticed, yet often require special coping efforts. 

20. Younger children have fewer resources to cope than older adults do.

21. Coping with traumatic events may last for a longer time than coping with everyday problems.

22. Some of the productive coping strategies are Seeking Social Support, Focus on Solving the Problem, Physical Recreation, Seek Relaxing Diversion, Investing in Close Friends, Seek to Belong, Work Hard and Achieve, Focus on the Positive.

23. Some of the non-productive Coping strategies are Worry, Wishful Thinking, and Not Cope, Ignore the Problem, Tension Reduction, Keep to Self, Self-blame.

24. Coping skills help us to appraise our situation more realistically, utilize resources more effectively and thus we can get better outcome from our coping strategies.

25. The first prerequisite for conscious development of coping skills is self-awareness, the second is motivation to change and the third prerequisite consists of the skills necessary to achieve the desired.

26. Acquisition of coping skills can be enhanced through educational or therapeutic intervention. Teaching coping skills to children and adolescents presents a potentially significant method of preventing and/or modifying dysfunctional or maladaptive behaviors.

27. Coping is not simply solving or managing problems, it is a means for human development and transformation.

Stress Coping Skills - ebook

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Problem solving-essential for stress management

Problem solving involves finding our way towards a goal. The object of problem solving is usually a solution, answer or conclusion. The capacity to solve problems successfully in the real world is a crucial component for one's well-being. Learning these skills helps us to improve our ability to cope with stress. Problem solving,
• Forms part of thinking.
• Most complex of all intellectual functions
• Higher-order cognitive process
• Fundamental skills
Common steps in problem solving
1. Problem orientation
2. Problem definition and formulation
3. Generation of solutions
4. Decision-making
5. Solution implementation and verification.

But the traditional information- processing model defined problem solving as a series of cognitive skills in problem identification, goal setting, finding suitable solutions and evaluating problem-solving outcomes, but largely ignored the motivational, affective and behavioural aspects of problem solving.
Ineffective problem solving and hasty decision making are more likely leads to emotional distress and stressful pay off. We need to develop systematic approach when we are dealing with complex real life problems.
Why some problems are complex
1. Conflicting motives
2. Uncertain, ambiguous situation
3. Risk involved
4. Different perspectives/ point of views
5. Many people involved
6. Different solution
Barriers
1. Lack of knowledge / skills
2. Personal / social factors- values, attitudes, emotion, expectation, pressure
3. Cognitive errors –rigid, impulsive thinking pattern
4. Poor emotional regulation –mood swing, aggression
5. Lack of social perception
6. Lack of motivation
7. Poor self regulation

Social Problems

Any situation that brings forth feelings of discomfort such as conflict, stress, anxiety etc. resulting from interaction or relationships with others. Social Problems including,

Impersonal problems such as-financial problems
Personal problems such as – emotional, behavioural problems

Interpersonal problems such as – marital, family conflict,

Social problems such as – violence, racial discrimination 

Social problem solving
The self-directed cognitive-behavioural-affective processes by which a person attempts to identify or discover effective or adaptive solutions for specific problems encountered in everyday living.
The interpersonal cognitive problem-solving
Ability to generate a number of alternative solutions to a conflict
Ability to choose and implement an appropriate solution to a conflict
Understanding and consideration of the social consequences of one’s actions for oneself and others.
The ways we approach our problems
Social problem solving becomes ineffective when it is dominated by a negative attitude towards problem solving, impulsiveness and acting out behaviour, or extreme delay and avoidance.
(1) Positive Problem Orientation - an optimistic attitude to tackling problems;
(2) Negative Problem Orientation -a pessimistic attitude to solving problems
(3) Rational Problem Solving -a systematic approach to solving problems, including problem definition, problem analysis, and generation of alternative solutions
(4) Impulsive/Careless Style -an ill-thought-out and hurried approach to solving problems
(5) Avoidance Style -a tendency to procrastinate, blame others, or depend on others to solve one’s problems.
Problem-solving therapy 
Training individuals to become better problem solvers in order to facilitate their ability to cope with stressful situations has been referred to in the psychotherapy and counseling literature as social problem solving therapy in order to highlight the social and interpersonal context in which real-life problem solving occurs. Teaching social problem solving skills has become a common feature of programs designed to prevent and remediate discipline problems. Therapy concentrates on counteracting impulsivity, defining problems, generating solutions, encouraging consequential thinking and developing means–end action planning.